University - The Power of Eight Months
I think that it is incredible how in the last eight months my
whole world, my outlook, my academic work, my creative writing, my
friendships, my understanding and even where I consider 'home' has changed. I
never thought that Uni would offer the variety of experiences it has and now,
as I prepare for my two end of year exams, and try to squeeze in 'final'
socialising events at the same time I find myself reflecting on the differences
and the changes that have taken place within those eight months. A strange joy,
mixed with pride and elation, colour these moments, and yet there are still
tones of sadness, regret, and ultimately realisation. In retrospect we often
look back a wish for a 'once over' and although in certain respects I do wish
this of the last eight months I know that I would never change them given the
choice in reality.
After all, we learn from our mistakes and our experiences, whether
they are positive or negative, and without every single second of the last
eight months I would not know much of what I do today.
Since September 17th I have been thrown a myriad
of new opportunities and experiences. Firstly,
I moved out of home, swapping the comfortable family bungalow for a student flat,
living with strangers. I registered at the University and before I knew it I
was sat in my introductory lectures. Next, I began to explore the town and the
people with who I live. As I explored further another first came along, I fell
in love. Shortly after I made a fool of myself and eventually I fell out of
love. Academically I got my first 1st in an essay about cross-dressing and
transgender in Elizabethan European Theatre (yep not kidding, love what I've
been learning on this course!) and I rang my mum ecstatically. By this time I
had found friends, lost friends (literally as well as mentally), and had gone
pubbing as well as clubbing for the first time in my life. 
There has never been
a period of time which has contained so much change. And for me, a girl
horrified by change, I think I have accepted it and coped rather well, if I may
say so. It could have been better and it could have been much much worse. I am
not afraid as I once was, there are still the occasional nerves, the flash of
fear, the anticipation as I await an essay mark, but the rest of the time
there's a relaxed, semi-irresponsibility about life here. Yeah we have to
'fend' for ourselves, but mums just a phone call away and there's people I can
talk to here about situations I would never discuss with her! In short, despite
bouts of worry, fear and sadness for the most part I am as happy as I have ever
been. I miss people, I wish something’s
turned out differently, but all in all I think it has been a rather successful
first year. Exams are looming, and soon I’ll no longer be a fresher. But that’s
okay, because if this year has taught me one thing, it is not to be afraid of
change. Change is an inevitable part of
life, and we can expect no other. Amyx
No comments:
Post a Comment